yah.. once school starts, my posts start getting boring and monotonous. well, what do you expect; it's daily school life. not much can happen that's worth blogging about, besides, i hardly have time these days. i'm in an extremely cbs mood these days, with like 32491374819734 things to do.
yesterday something quite disturbing happened. i was sitting in band.. yer..i finally got off my bum and joined band before my clarinet turns to wood old enough to make someone's furniture or something -.- when i turned around and was appalled and disgusted at the same time. there was this isolated oboe player (i have no idea why he was ostracized anyway) but he was holding his oboe with one hand, and stroking his thigh with the other in an extremely deliberate, sexual, suggestive manner. up..down..up..down.. -.- lol.. i always knew that oboe players were slighty weird.. anyway maybe no one was sitting next to him coz everyone was afraid he'd reach over and stroke them *shudder*
anyway, the first week (considering how i'm wagging aths tomorrow) of term two is over, and it feels like ages already. melbourne weather is truly capricious -.- it's autumn now and it's still like summer-ish weather some days. enough of the hot weather already :p
i've been such a scatterbrain these days. lots to do and can't remember most of it. uhm, yes, dance perf in six weeks which i'm not prepared for either. anyway, chinese today was funny ._. mr yu absolutely cannot accept that india's population has now overtaken china. he stubbornly insisted that china still remained the country with the largest population. everyone else was like -.-"
i just got back from piano and i have worship practice later i think. and we're going out for dinner tonight. dad's going back to singapore tomorrow. oh, i wish i could go too. mm :p and tonight's my tv night. yay, the simple indulgence of tv and dinner out with my family keep me satisfied :)

i wanna go for exchange after yr 12 to france/italy/u.s.
i got my psych sac back - 40/40 yay
formal coming up april 8th next sat - ed got a suit hahah :p eat ur heart out jan coz as far as i know brendan isnt wearing a suit.
i learnt to do a french braid all by myself *proud grin*
i have formal shoes/dress but i need to arrange hair, makeup, *wrap* thingy..
have to get work experience form from ms chasen tomorrow
very stoned and tired today
called up hair place - $70 for permenant perm anywhere between $50 - $75 for temp curls and styling.. gee..wonder which is more worth it coz my curls are coming undone anyway..
easter camp the week after formal have to decide by sunday..
wagging aths on friday..
gotta do lit wuthering heights creative assesment (due weds) , memorize personal reflective draft (due tues), compile gen. notes, be a cheapo and read turn of the screw chapter summaries instead of the book..
maybe going to sweden in june..
work experience in july..

Forever Young
Let's dance in style, let's dance for a while
Heaven can wait we're only watching the skies
Hoping for the best, but expecting the worst
Are you gonna drop the bomb or not

Let us die young or let us live forever
We don't have the power, but we never say never
Sitting in a sand-pit, life is a short trip
The music's for the sad men.

Can you imagine when this race is won
Turn our golden faces into the sun
Praising our leaders, we're getting in tune
The music's played by the, the mad men

Forever young, I want to be forever young
Do you really want to live forever, forever, forever?
Forever young, I want to be forever young
Do you really want to live forever, forever, forever?

Some are like water, some are like the heat
Some are a melody and some are the beat
Sooner or later they'll all be gone
Why don't they stay young?

It's so hard to get old without a cause
I don't want to perish like a fading horse
Youth is like diamonds in the sun
and diamonds are forever

So many adventures couldn't happen today
So many songs we forgot to play
So many dreams swinging out of the blue
We let them come true

Forever young, I want to be forever young
Do you really want to live forever, forever, forever?
Forever young, I want to be forever young
Do you really want to live forever, forever, forever?

Forever young, I want to be forever young
Do you really want to live forever?

This is edyth and i. (: we were friends since i was like, eight. well, since the age of the ancient black-and-white sticky photo machines.. now she's a third year uni, i'm in year 11. time flies. (:

Shoes Glorious Shoes.
As a truly shoe-crazy girl, this is my tribute to my love :p foootwear! yay! it's my small.. but growing collection.. i'm always on the lookout for more shoes ..:p
my beloved peachy havvies :p which egghead helped me choose. :D i love them.
mmm.. just for.. lazy days xD
i wear these everytime i'm wearing pants that are too long for me :p which is quite often. they are very comfortable wedges.
prettier, but less comfortable :p
mmm xD i like these. don't wear them so often though.
=D
more pointy shoes.
this seems quite work-ish.
=D shoes make me happy
when i feel like being practical :D
heehee i rarely wear these coz they're so white, i'd hate to get them dirty.
my trusted skechers.. they're old, but i love them anyway.
my first pair of not-so-nice boots.
the beginning of a boot fetish.
i tried..
but i couldn't stop..
my most recent indulgence, $100 from chaddy.

hello...umm..sorry i'm a little distracted at the moment, maybe coz my mum's going skitz on me now. (told you) i think it's the shoes. yes.. the $100 shoes.
soo.. i woke up like 5 minutes before church today.. rushed there looking totally mismatched.. i had to endure the agony of being disgracefully mismatched for almost the whole day before i could get home and (finally) change.. *shudder*
i suddenly remembered i have a hiphop dance performance coming up in six weeks. and i'm sooo unco and i barely remember the choreography. :p oh well.
anyway, lol, during church bathsheba was mentioned plenty. last night i felt quite sexually immoral coz i turned on the telly right on this really wrong ritualistic scene of eyes wide shut.. left me feeling guilty and dirty too.. after i switched it off.. i was busy moaning about how my new name was bathsheba (for those who don't know, bathsheba is the lady who committed sexual immorality with david) and.. coincidentally she was mentioned today :p amidst much snickering and laughter between pris and i. ohh.. today in church we sang "i could sing of your love" and "faith like a child".. two songs which have really been stuck in my head for a long time that have special meaning to me.. and still speaks to me now.. because it tells me that as long as i have the unerring unmovable faith like that of a child, nothing is impossible..
anyway, after church pris, isaac and i set off to hunt for formal shoes. we initially were looking for silver shoes, but summer stocks are apparently all out and they've just stocked in the cool-season shoes, boots and all.. the colors aren't right either because they've got lots of gold and orange and red *autumny colors* and not silver.. =( what a pity.. we got desperate and exhausted every shoe store in chadstone.. some of which were so branded they made me balk upon flipping the shoe and seeing the three-digit prices =| i got quite apprehensive of stores which sported names of designers.. (those "name" shops are always branded to the ultimate..) anyway.. i didn't really find any shoes that i really liked, and pris and i were both getting desperate.. isaac began to sound slightly hysterical when i mentioned re-combing the place this time being open to other colors..poor boy. gotta give him credit for trudging along without fainting halfway through it. good stamina i must say. although i think he went just to check out chicks in pointy shoes :p or just gaze lustfully at the pointy shoes on display anyway. anyway to cut it short, we found gold shoes for 100 bucks.. mum isn't too happy.. i wonder what she'll say when i suggest to get my hair/makeup done.. hmmm.. maybe now isn't the time to bring it up :p lol..
isaac with a hat :p he thinks they're cool. not many people would do this but it takes a certain type of freak who's just weird enough and slightly demented.
briefly in a frenzied state of desperation, i considered crocs but was hastily advised against it by isaac :p nah, he made me take this picture ._. i hate crocs. my feet feel violated that they came into contact with crocs. -.-
so anyway, it hit me that school's starting on tuesday. i came home and flipped through my planner and school books in a crazed frenzy. i have this sinking suspicion that on the last day of school, i had so much work that a fraction of my mind collapsed and i deluded myself into thinking i had no work whatsoever just as a solace to my poor broken mind. umm.
alright, stuff on my to-do list at the moment:
- find gold jewellery. * hunt down the gold chain with the sapphire leaf pendant (sounds good?) and maybe thin gold watch/bracelet/earrings
- get ideas for my lit creative response on wuthering heights and start drafting my response.
- select a topic for english personal writing and draft an essay.
- decide where to do makeup and what to do for hair.
oh woe is me.
i have coffee tomorrow with edyth (: haven't seen her in forever.

ahhh.. hurt..hurt >< my arms hurt from badminton.. i ache all over from three months' worth of consecutive sleep on the sofa every night.. which can be comfortable at first..but when you have to lie still the whole night cos u can't roll sideways or you'll just roll off the sofa.. it's horrible sleep. i'm sleeping on the sofa presently because i'm probably the only member of the family short enough to fit the length of the sofa. -.-" lucky me.
uhhmm.. man.. i was hit by a bout of depression today.. or was it the past few days.. i can't tell because it's been highs and lows, but temporary highs.. before dropping back down again.. and the feeling sucks.. to be trying to occupy yourself.. so that you don't have so much time left for thinking.. because thinking ultimately results in wallowing in pits of self pity.. i know it could sound quite cliched.. but i've been feeling very alone lately.. sort of like.. i'm still holding back.. and i don't know why.. and yesterday someone told me something i needed to hear though i guess i didn't want to.. that i had to start learning to make my own decisions instead of always relying on people.. because there might come a day when there's no one to rely on.. when i asked the person what he meant.. he merely replied that he was talking crap.. but it bothered me and so i went home and mulled over it for awhile.. till i got what he said.. yes..
because things change.. no matter how secure your life feels in one moment.. no matter how perfect, how stable, how happy.. the next minute it can all come crashing down.. not that i'm going through that right now.. but my life now does seem like a far cry from some of the happiest moments of last year.. where it seemed like nothing in the world could be wrong.. because my life was so happy and perfect.. at least.. i was.. now things are quite different.. it feels like being caught.. with no place to go.. because you don't fully belong anywhere but maybe you don't want to either.. i don't know.. i suppose its the question of choosing between ten good friends and two best friends.. or something like that.. yeah.. what would you choose?
cos i'm drifting.. just drifting.. with nowhere to go home to.
yeah, that's what it feels like right now.
so i was left hanging in one of my conversations just then.. when i really felt like crap and would've wanted company.. yeah.. felt like i was deserted.. but whatever.. i decided to dump on other people..
according to zhiming.. i think way too *beeping * much and should just be happy and settle down.. and he did cheer me up sufficiently.. (:
and according to melly.. she is very deep.. i cant really remember what she said but i felt better after that..
and according to jan.. pic nics are cool..
i love them all dearly too =)
i was watching the ducks on the lake just then.. and it occurred to me that they do seem to have a rather peaceful life.. just..swimming or flying.. it's quite concern-free..but that's the price of intelligence.. complications that come with it..
i'm not making sense now am i? i think i'm rambling. (jan you're right, i do ramble.)

i crawled out of bed bright and early to play baddy with ray, tiffie, clifford, david loo (nipple boy) don't ask me i don't know why he's nipple boy either, and joyce. despite ray's claims that he is very noobish at badminton (in response to my own declarations of noobiness) i found out that he is indeed, not at all, noobish at badminton.
that's ray and clifford playing badminton. note : never believe ray when he claim's he's bad at anything. i felt very intimidated by the two of them ._. they were sending shuttlecocks whooshing at each other. look at how the light slants in. i'm quite impressed by tiffie's photo-taking skills. (: i also discovered that i only function with the right forehand and cannot do a backhand for nuts. i also cannot serve. *nods* quite sad indeed.. i was very angry that i missed the yellowcard concert (tickets $50 only!) and made sure everyone knew that :p i think i moaned and whined tiffie's ears off. ugh. i was so upset that i felt the mood to play badminton rapidly slipping away. oh yellowcard my love. come back to melbourne next time when i'm more informed. i don't mind braving the buckets of sweat just to see you guys.
another discovery i made is that i'm disgracefully unfit. i knew i had the physical endurance of a snail but i never expected it to be that bad. i felt all queasy for the rest of the day (no, not fun at all.) and i was also very excited when we approaced ray's secret gate. *claps* heehee. i love secret gates. how very conspiracal.
anyway, met isaac after. 2 bums who can't decide anything and can't be bothered doing anything :p well, we just bummed around literally the whole time.
oh the tram we met two aboriginal activists who were very enthusiastic on their stands. they talked the whole time and i only got about 1/5 of what they said. anyway, the guy was saying something about how he discovered all malaysians, chinese, koreans, viets, and asians were related. i interjected that asia was a continent and therefore all malaysians, chinese, koreans, and viets were also asians :p then the next thing the guy said was some reference about asia as a country. lol. i couldn't help interjecting - continent. which supremely annoyed him i think :p lol.. well..they were a married couple, the girl was 20 years old (isaac's age! geeeeees.) look at the difference. one's in uni, studying um.. music. stuff. -.- and one's a mother of four and her eldest is five. that would've meant she did it at like.. 15 years. which is my age. and got pregnant. *shudder* i got to hold the baby. she was really pretty but she squirmed alot :p i'm not too good with babies. i like playing with them and all, but carrying them is a different question. i somehow always envision them slipping from my hold and slow-motion falling to the ground, and finally landing, their heads cracking like an egg cracks when it's dropped. urgh. they even got isaac's number too. :p lol.
when we got off the tram, isaac cracked up. this is why.
uhh..lol, if you click on it and zoom in on the words, it says, "can i suck you..blah blah" it's a sign in the city on the phonebooth.
after that isaac went somewhat maniacal and frenzied over orange. he was on an orange-spotting trip the whole time :p well, orange or peach.
i despise crocs with much disgust. they are so ugly, they should be banned. anyone who owns crocs should be sent on one of those ships out to sea that never return.
this is a mannequin in the corner of glue. isaac made me take this picture, and my mum saw it while i was resizing it on my computer and accused me of looking at porn. she stopped and shrieked "why are you looking at porn?!" -.- you can tell my mum is slightly obsessive. she thought this red dye mark left on my arm from the dye 2 days before was a love bite. yesterday i had a conversation with pris and isaac bout love bites. i'm sure they do exist, if my mum says so. :p
preeetty cool eh. the top of melbourne central. very nice indeed. isaac decided to be a moment-ruiner and walk by all the couples in the smooch-chairs just to observe them :p
after walking up and down and everywhere :p oh - isaac almost got run over by a car ._. it was quite funny :p and he was very traumatised from the shock of it. lol. and he was quite amused by the busker on flinders st who did hula hoops. he theorized that the busker must be very good at sex because he gyrated/rotated his pelvic area so much. -.-"
after walking to a million places, the shops closed and we decided to go back to federation. this is a bad bad picture ._. but alright, whatever :p
as you can tell, i'm quite tired and lazy to blog. :p

omg for once right now, i really wish this blog's private. but there's no such thing as a private blog is there? people end up reading it, whether you know them or not. once i had a private blog (nothing fancy, no names) and some random chick thought i was depressed (as in clinically depressed) oh shut up and stop snickering just because i express myself well..apparently too well since she left me an email to add her if i was suffering from depression and needed to talk. well, that was the end of my private blog. being the lazy arse i am, i can't really be bothered writing in any book. besides, i'd rather any person in the world out there read it rather than my family.
speaking of family, i am so cut at my sister. skip to one paragraph down if you're not in the mood to read my rant. she's the bloody anorexic one and she calls me anorexic. i reckon she just likes seeing me eat so she feels better about herself eating. it's so bullshit because the past few days i've been out and i ate out (lots of sushi) *rolls eyes* - thanks to zhen and jan, i'm not sure who passed the sushi craze to me. and when i come back i hardly have any appetite anymore. and then she tells my parents i'm anorexic. shit, i'm not the one whose period stopped because i stopped eating. i'm not the one who refused to sit because she thought she was burning energy, and thus losing calories, by standing. i'm not the one who refused to wear jackets when she was cold because she thought she was burning yet more energy and calories. i'm not the one who stopped eating meat and ate only fruits. i'm not the one who throws away her sandwich during lunch. so there. it pisses me off when she whines in her brattiest voice to my parents that i'm anorexic. by now, my overprotective parents having had that experience with her, force food down my throat when i'm about to burst. just to prove i'm not anorexic at all, here's what i ate today.
- taro bubble cup with pearls.
- trampoline tiramisu little cone
- smoke salmon hand roll
- california hand roll
- yakitori chicken stick
- chocolate penguin
does that look like the menu of someone who's anorexic? as compared to
- nothing all day
so as you can see, this is annoying the crap out of me. it really shits me.
anyway, i'm not going to blog much about today because there's nothing to say. i got really depressed after a while and lost my mood to do much. and then jan came to meet us. (: you know, i'll just blog photos and yeah, let the pictures do the talking.
the rabbit. it's rather timid.
bena and i outside state library. it's like, massive.
once again, i repeat. i am not anorexic. look at the elephantloads of food. and unhealthy food too.
mmm. somewhere.
random mhs guys.
the gohs.
(:
penguin and snail (:
bhs ppl.

zhen & i (:
group. the machines are so backward.
they are very ancient
yay (:
again!

i am very sexy according to the machine -.-"
this is 385 bourke st, where i'm doing my work experience in herbert, geer & rundle law.
this is bourke street (: in the city.
i ordered food and they had to take my name. i said very clearly "xinni"
this is what turned out on the receipt.