my mum the spider killing machine
my mum seems to have something with spiders, she really does. she's probably like Most Wanted Spider Terrorist on the spider network. =\ terrorizing the lives of "innocent" spiders around. not that spiders themselves don't do quite a bit of terrorizing.
i've sort of observed my mum lately. she's been developing newer, more morbid ways of getting rid of spiders. it was merely last week when she discovered one of those eight-legged freaks crawling on the body of her car. she promptly ordered everyone to back away and advanced on the spider with a big roll of the progress leader in her hand. it reminded me of a hunter sneaking up on its prey. she sort of leaped forward and whacked the copy of the progress leader on the spider, which fell all curled up on the ground. gosh. spiders. =| why they curl up when they die is another mystery. would you want to go up to heaven with your legs all cramped?
anyway, so begins today's spider adventure. i was innocently walking into my room when THERE. ON THE WALL. WAS THE BIGGEST, FATTEST, MOST HAIRIEST, FREAKIEST, EIGHT-LEGGED PIECE OF BLACK SHIT PERCHED ON THE WALL OVER MY GRANDMA'S HEAD!!
i'm not kidding!!
it was monstrous!!
i am not kidding, i have never seen such a monstrously huge spider perched anywhere. somehow i didn't think of making friends with it and calling it charlotte. bloody spider scared the daylights out of me.i've always had an avid aversion to anything with more than four legs and that looks remotely like an insect to me.
in comes mum the spiderbuster.
this time, she used the vacuumn cleaner!!
hello!! correct me if i'm wrong! but a vacuumn cleaner is to suck dust!! not SPIDERS!! not big fat hairy ones either!! but my sadistic evil mum SUCKED the spider into the swirling vortex of the vacuumn cleaner!! it went in with a slurping sound. i do not want to see the insides of the vacuumn cleaner now :|
math is giving me a headache. i know those outcomes are next week but i can't seem to get my brain to work.
i know you people are sort of wondering what kinda mum i have now ._.